i'm so terribly afraid of wasting my life. in fact, i think it's my worst fear.
so when i feel like i'm wasting time i get amazingly sad. it might be selfishness to some degree, though.
because all i ever really want to do is spend time with a select few, and that's hard to pull off.
it's what i want to do, and it's hard to do it. and i get frustrated. and when i get frustrated, i get sad, etc.
so, in a sense, what i want is selfish. but that makes sense because it's what i want...it's the definition of selfishness.
is it wicked not to care?